Lauren Harris - 'Calm Before the Storm' (DR2 Records)

It's all too easy to go into this review in a scathing frame of mind. After all, there's a lot of great young music artists out there at the moment, working their asses off, looking for that big break that most likely will never come along. LAUREN HARRIS however, was born with the proverbial silver spoon in her mouth (for those of you who live a sheltered life, she's the daughter of IRON MAIDEN mastermind Steve Harris). Ever since she's been into singing, she's opened for pretty much every IRON MAIDEN show playing to hundreds of thousands of fans all around the world. The fact is though, if she was just a Maiden fan and gave this CD to Steve Harris, he'd play it for the best part of a minute, and throw it straight into the bin.

   

With respect to Lauren, the last young rock chick looking to make it on the back of her daddy's success was Kelly Osbourne, and believe me, this is way better than the utter horse shit that she produced. Lauren Harris does have some talent as she can actually sing, and does look damn good on stage - she'd make a damn good karaoke singer that's for sure!

 

The style of the album is just simple, straight-on, rock music and if I had to liken it to another artist, I'd plump for LITA FORD. The main problem  though is that Lauren's too much of a cutie. Maybe she should have downed a few bottles of Jack Daniels before she went into the studio, anything to give the songs a bit more attitude. It's almost like every song here follows a predicatble blue print. Verse, chorus, verse, chorus, guitar solo, chorus. The key word I would use to describe this album is flat.

 

I don't really know who this album is trying to impress. The poppy approach of 'Your Turn' and 'Get Over It' fall amazingly short of the hooks that would inspire the AVRIL LAVIGNE generation, and the slightly provocative 'Come On Over' doesn't have nearly enough bite to excite a metal fan.
As for the cover of UFO's 'Natural Thing', if Michael Schenker ever hears it, he'll be reaching for a bottle of Courvoisier cognac quicker than you can say lights out!

   

Overall, this is a poor album and a totally uninspiring listen. OK, the production is good, the band's playing is nice and tight, and the package is all very professional - but the songs and the swagger just ain't there. As the old saying goes, you can't polish a turd.

  

Rating 1.5/5.0


James Allman

 

Release Date: Out Now!